No Scout Badges for "Best Performance"
No Scout Badges for "Best Performance"
A friend hit me up with a question: "Do I need to learn how to squirt? Is that, like, a thing I should be doing?" Questions like this are really common in my line of work. It got me thinking about how we often see sex as a list of things to do, like we're trying to earn badges or something. But really, sex isn't about ticking off a to-do list. There are no Scout Badges for “Best Performance.”
What's up with the Checklist?
You know how we're always hearing about new things to try in bed? Like a gazillion positions or finding out there's more than one type of orgasm? It's cool to know about all this stuff, but some folks think they're supposed to master everything. Like, if we don't, we're somehow missing out. But here's the deal: sex isn't a scavenger hunt.
The Pressure to Perform
Trying to hit all these 'sexual achievements' can actually stress us out. Ever felt like you're supposed to have every kind of orgasm out there? Or try every position in the Kama Sutra by next Thursday? Yeah, that's a lot. And it's totally normal if that pressure takes the fun out of things. It can even make us feel down if we don't tick all the boxes.
Understanding vs. Chasing
It's great to know about all of the variety contained in sexual behaviors – it's like having a big menu to choose from. But you don't have to order everything on the menu, right? Pick what you like, what feels good to you and your partner. It's about enjoying that menu, without feeling a need to eat everything all in one night.
Your Sexy Journey – No Maps Needed
Everyone's different, and that's awesome. What works for your friend might not work for you, and that's totally fine. Embrace what you love, explore if you want to, but there's no need to keep score or compare notes.
In a Nutshell
Sex is personal, it can be fun, and as unique as you are. It's not about collecting experiences like they're Pokémon cards. It's about feeling good, connected, and happy in the moment. Let's focus on enjoying our own side of the street, without worrying about what everyone else is doing.
It's Your Choice, and That's More Than Okay!
Before we wrap up, here's the thing: while we're talking about not turning sex into some hunt for scout badges for “best performance”, remember – what you like in the bedroom is totally your call. If experimenting with new things is your jam, go for it! I’ve even got a tool for you for that! What matters most is doing what feels right for you. It's like picking your favorite flavor of ice cream – there's no right or wrong choice, just what makes you smile. So, whether you're all about trying new things or you're happy with the classics, you're doing just fine. The key is to enjoy yourself and do things that feel good, without getting caught up in what everyone else might be doing.
xxoo,
Lanae
On the blog
Here are some things I’ve been writing about over on my blog. Less things I wanna talk about (like over here), and more things people might google for answers.
No Nut November: A Critical Look at the No-Fap Challenge