Relationship Fairy Tales are the tropes we follow (but need to let go of). Whether we know it or not, these fairy tales can be damaging to our real-life relationships - and the way we view relationships in general.
Here are the ones I believe we need to ditch ASAP:
“My person”
This sentiment leads us to believe there is only ONE person in the entire world for us. While some people may stay in a relationship with only one person in their lifetime, most won’t—and this sentiment can make them believe they’re a “failure.”
“Meant to be”
“Meant to be” takes away a lot of your power of choice! If you want to be in a relationship, it’s your choice. There are many options, and whichever you choose is up to you. There’s not one predestined option that’s better than others.
Marrying the boss
See Bridget Jones Diary. See Maid in Manhattan. A woman’s only option is not just to marry her boss. It’s outdated, patriarchal, and makes light of power dynamics in the workplace (and elsewhere).
Stalking is romantic
See Failure to Launch, See 50 First Dates. Or showing up in someone’s bedroom to watch them sleep like in Twilight (I’m looking at YOU, Edward Cullen!). There’s nothing romantic about stalking, and you can watch the Netflix show You for proof.
I hate you and then I love you
See Moonstruck, see Knocked Up. I hate you then I love you needs to go because it sets up the expectation that relationships are a rollercoaster, swinging from one end of the pendulum to the next. Healthy relationships are not generally that way.
Happily ever after and the Hollywood "Happy ending"
This whole “Happily Ever After” trope needs to be rebranded to something more real. Mostly, to help us manage disappointment with real-life relationships! Nothing is just perfect from one point in time forward. Relationships shift and change over time.
Your turn: What did I miss? What relationship fairy tales are you so over? Share in the comments below!
xxoo,
Lanae
Mine would be:
You'll find someone soon.
You just have to go out and find someone.
You have to love yourself before loving someone else.
Love is free.
You'll find someone soon.
There is someone out there for you.
There is a woman for every man somewhere in the world.